Brad Pitt to retire from acting at 50

Brad Pitt announced today that he will retire from acting once he turns 50.  The 47 year old actor claims that he is tired of being adored.  There have been times he has considered burning his beautiful face with acid just so he would be left alone by the millions of women who throw themselves at his feet daily.  In a statement made to the press today, Brad said "I figured that I would have gotten at least a little less attractive by this age, but it just doesn't seem to happen.  I can't go anywhere without beautiful women grabbing at my clothes or asking me to touch their breasts.  It's really a curse.  I mean, look at Brando.  He eventually got fat and ugly and ended up having to pay prostitutes to please him.  Clooney is starting to lose his looks.  Johnny Depp is an ugly pirate now.  Why am I still so attractive?  I have lost all my faith in God."

Pitt plans on spending more time with his family and working behind the scenes at his home recording studio producing comedy albums for Fear Factor host Joe Rogan.